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Thanksgiving Reflections at CORE

As Thanksgiving approaches, CORE wishes everyone a harvest of blessings, good health, and happiness! This holiday is a special time to gather with loved ones and reflect gratefully on the peace, abundance, and blessings in our lives. And, of course, we get to share delicious food and watch football, too!

Thanksgiving Day is a favorite holiday at CORE because gratitude is at the heart of recovery. With this in mind, we recently attended a CORE event in search of thankful people – and we were not disappointed! Tape recorder in hand, we stopped as many current and former clients as we could catch to ask what they’re most thankful for. Their answers, shared below, are a gift to us all this season.

“I am thankful for my relationship with God and all the amazing people he put into my life.  And opportunities, too.  I’m manager at my job now.”
– Abby B

“For Jesus Christ, my salvation, and recovery.”
– Daniel B

“I’m very grateful for my new life, financial stability, and freedom.  I never thought I could live on my own, because for the longest time I didn’t trust my own thinking.  But having my relationship with God, I was able to take that leap of faith and have confidence.”
– Kristi K

“I’m thankful for my relationship with God that happened through working the 12 Steps.  And having my family back together – my wife and children.  I’m also thankful for CORE, the men and women here who led me out of the hole of addiction.”
– Dallas C

“We have leaders in this program who provide leadership, guidance, and direction on a daily basis. And the girls here – they knew where I came from, held me accountable, and helped me through my character defects.  I’m also thankful to be able to give back.  This program saved my life three years ago.”
– Jeana K

“Understanding what it means to be in God’s grace and actually knowing God – I wouldn’t trade them for anything.”
– Robert S

“God loves me, looks out for me, and directs me.  I’m thankful for my sobriety today.  I’m thankful for CORE, for giving me a safe place to lay my head, and for the people here and the friends I’ve made, who’re like family.”
– Robin T

“How God is working in my life, and for the CORE program and the people in it.  I’ve been sober 3 ½ years by the grace of God and this program.  They saved my life.”
– Adam G

“For God – my relationship with God.  This Sunday will make four years.  It’s a complete miracle.”
– Jen B

“I’m really grateful for the support system I have here, and for everyone I’ve met.  I’m thankful for CORE.”
– Robert M

“I’m grateful for the person God has helped me grow into and the relationships he helped me build.  For literally everything – for my life.”
– Stephanie U

“I am thankful for God putting me here to see others find recovery.  And my life in sobriety too.  My nieces and nephews just know me as their aunt Alex.  I’m recovered.”
– Alexandria P

“My sobriety, employment, and home.”
– Matt N

“God gave me another chance in life.  I’m thankful for his understanding and forgiveness, and everything that comes with it.  My family and loved ones, and building a new family within CORE.”
– Jen M 

“I’m thankful for the opportunity to serve God, and the opportunity to give back to the program that’s given so much to me.”
– Todd T

“For God and CORE, who helped me become the person my son and parents are proud of and thankful for.”
– Megan W

“I’m grateful for the opportunity to serve people who are in need.  I can give back to a community who needs my help.”
– Don S

“I’m thankful that God showed me who I am, my real self and identity.  I’m a better version of myself with values and purpose.  And for the CORE program, of course, and the people I know here.”
– Heather S

“My life, recovery, and for my family and children loving me again.
– Brian F

“Second chances, open doors, and my recovery family.”
– Tamara S

“Relationship with God.  My family.  My sobriety and recovery.”
– Dylan B

“This year I’m most grateful for my children and relationships with them, and for the people who took care of them while I couldn’t.”
– Katie R

“God took my hand and walked me through this.  I couldn’t have done it without him.  I’m just really thankful that he’s held onto me the whole time and I succeeded.”
– Samantha S

Jay Scribner: Friend of CORE

Since our inception, CORE has been fortunate to receive the invaluable support and guidance of many esteemed business and civic leaders from the Tri-Lakes area. While we typically refrain from name-dropping, when one of our most respected community leaders agrees to sit down for an interview, we can’t help but proudly share:

Meet Jay Scribner! 

Jay and his wife, Kay, have been integral members of the Branson community since 1977. For twenty-eight years, Jay faithfully served as a pastor of First Baptist Church, and his subsequent retirement hasn’t slowed him down in the slightest. He has continued his ministry work with the same passion and dedication—and that includes his significant contributions to CORE! We recently had the pleasure of sitting down with Jay to discuss his impactful role in our program and to hear his thoughts.

Originally from Illinois, Jay received his degrees from Oklahoma Baptist University and Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. His early work in Fort Worth’s inner city equipped him with the skills and vision to grow Branson’s First Baptist Church from a small congregation into one of Branson’s largest churches. “God really gave us His favor, and we’re thankful for that,” Jay says. “We began to grow, minister to people, lead them to Christ, and watch them grow spiritually. Eventually, we outgrew our facilities and relocated to where we are now.”

Though Jay officially retired from his duties at FBC more than a decade ago, his ministry is far from over. As he puts it, “My motivation is to help people. And especially to help them find Jesus Christ. It doesn’t matter who they are or what their circumstances are.” His passion drives him in remarkable ways. Beyond his guest appearances and preaching engagements, Jay’s opportunities to share the Gospel arise just about everywhere, as if by divine appointment.  Even a chance encounter at the grocery store or a brief conversation at the gas station might evolve into a meaningful ministering opportunity for him that lasts for years.

Without doubt, Jay’s ministry is no longer confined to the walls of a single church—his flock has expanded to encompass the entire Tri-Lakes area. Wherever he goes, whether in the community or on the road, Jay finds ways to teach, guide, and minister. His reach is as broad as his heart for serving others, and his impact on those around him is positive and meaningful.  

Jay’s contact with CORE goes back almost to the beginning, when our organization was still just a startup mission.  His good nature, candor, and wit, inspire the confidence and trust of everyone he meets. Jay’s reputation as a widely respected pastor also leads CORE clients to view him as a figure of moral authority.  They see him dispense wisdom and learning impartially and credibly. Thus, even now, when clients succeed by following his counsel, they actually go out of their way to let him know, seeking validation and approval from him as a mentor and spiritual leader.  

As a “normie” who volunteers without obligation, Jay’s presence alone at CORE shows genuine care.  Whether preaching at our church services, teaching our spirituality classes, or simply attending one of our calendared events, over the course of three decades Jay has been a dear and trusted friend of our organization.  We at CORE are humbled and grateful for his interest in our well-being.  And curious, too!  So we asked Jay why he freely devotes so much of his time and effort on us.  His response was both insightful and heartfelt.

First, Jay is deeply moved by CORE’s track record of success in helping people recover from substance abuse. He states, “Anywhere you slice this program, CORE is faith-based 100%, unapologetically. I see the success of it. You’re genuinely helping people. You meet them at the point of their need. And you’re not giving them a handout; you’re giving them a hand up.” His belief in the transformative power of faith is central to why he remains committed. He sees firsthand how lives are changed, not just temporarily, but in ways that offer lasting recovery and hope. For Jay, this makes CORE stand out—it’s not just about addressing addiction but also about helping our clients reclaim their spiritual bearings and purpose.

Second, Jay recognizes that the unique qualities of our clients create an environment ripe for mentoring and teaching. “The crowd from CORE isn’t necessarily your normal church crowd,” he explains. “They are not pretentious. They don’t pretend. What you see is what you get. They know who they are, where they are, and why they’re here. And I just love that about CORE. There’s no pretense. I can get right down to the nitty gritty pretty quickly.” Jay appreciates the authenticity of people who come through our program, recognizing that their openness and self-awareness allow for deeper, more meaningful engagement. This level of raw honesty and self-recognition fuels his passion for clients who are sincerely seeking help.

Third, Jay’s connection with CORE extends to the staff, which, as he puts it, thrills him just as much as it does us. He’s built a strong rapport with our CEO Cary McKee and the rest of the leadership team, and his appreciation is evident. “I became acquainted with Cary and really appreciated his leadership, his administrative abilities, and especially his vision. The more I’m around the leadership, the more I’m phenomenally impressed that everyone on your staff has been through the program. Those who serve in CORE are those who have been served. It gives the leadership a leg up that is astounding, in my opinion.” This element of shared experience, where leaders have personally walked the path to recovery, resonates deeply with Jay. It’s this sense of empathy and lived experience that he believes gives CORE its unique strength and effectiveness.

We also asked Jay how he sees CORE evolving going forward.  He indicated that changes might be made when they are indicated, but that the most important thing is for CORE to remain true to our values as a faith-based recovery program and to stay on task.  By way of illustration, Jay cited the Christian church today and told us a parable about he and his wife taking a jon boat out on Table Rock Lake.  One hundred yards out from the dock, his wife asks “Did you remember to put the plug in the boat?”  To which Jay answers, “I wish you would have asked me that about one-hundred yards back.”  The practical lesson is evident: boat in the water is okay; water in the boat is not.  The spiritual lesson is profound: “The church in the world is fine; the world in the church is not.”  CORE, likewise, must remain true to our faith-based values.  We should avoid any outside pressures to change what we already know works and have confidence in.

As our interview concluded, Jay shared a Bible verse that he feels encapsulates the essence of our program: “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: the old has gone, the new is here.” 2 Corinthians 5:17. We think his choice of scripture beautifully reflects CORE’s mission.

Jay’s long-standing commitment to CORE and his unwavering dedication to our community are truly inspiring. His passion for helping others, his authenticity, and his profound faith continue to leave a lasting impact on everyone he encounters. We at CORE are deeply grateful for his wisdom, guidance, and friendship, and we are fortunate to count him as one of our most trusted supporters!

Step 10 – “1 Minute to Judge Wapner”

At CORE, those of us working the 12 Steps are happily recovered today, but it wasn’t always this way. During our addictions, simply being conscious without the influence of alcohol or drugs was unbearable. We were profoundly maladjusted to life. Our singular focus became obtaining our substance of choice, making everything and everyone else secondary. This extreme self-centeredness—where our personal needs and desires took precedence over everything—was staggering. It’s no wonder our lives were, as the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous says, “unmanageable.” Our relationships were broken, our work lives were in shambles, and the world itself seemed hostile.

It all seemed hopeless, and it would have remained so if not for the 12 Steps. As we worked through them, especially when we placed our will and lives in the care of God, we began to realize that the problem wasn’t with the world or the people around us—it was within us. We also recognized that the selfishness we wore so openly during our addictions had plagued us long before our drinking and drugging became oppressive.  The harsh truth was that reality wasn’t going to change for us. If we wanted any hope of a happy and normal life, we had to drastically rethink our understanding of the world and our relationships with the people in it.

Steps 4 through 9 provided exactly what we needed. We discovered that our resentments, fears, and the harms we caused others arose from our own self-centeredness. We began to clearly see our part in our troubles. Realizing we weren’t perfect, we also stopped demanding perfection from others. We became more accepting, tolerant, and forgiving – not just of the people around us but also of the world itself. We started caring about others again, treating them with the same respect and kindness we wanted for ourselves and our loved ones.

This transformation wasn’t one-sided. As we changed, so did the way people responded to us. Our attitudes toward life began to brighten, and the world, which once seemed intolerable, became not only bearable but worth living in. In moving from a self-centered existence to a God-centered one, we found new hope, purpose, and meaning.

And in the midst of this change, something miraculous happened—just as the Big Book promises. The obsession to drink or use drugs was lifted. As it says, “We feel as though we have been placed in a position of neutrality—safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed.” Our sanity returned. We had truly recovered.

This brings us to critically important Step 10, which says “Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.”

By the time we reach this step, we’ve made a ton of progress. We may even look and act more or less like normal people again. We are now empowered to say no to drugs and alcohol, and we can choose to be the kind of people God wants us to be. We’ve reconciled with the world, and our future looks bright, filled with hope and purpose. It seems like we can have it all.

But there’s a catch – our choices still matter. We can choose to continue doing God’s will and looking out for our fellow humans, or we can revert to making self-centered decisions based on selfish motives. If we do the latter, we risk backsliding, putting ourselves back into conflict with others, and succumbing once again to selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. We become restless, irritable, and discontent. And eventually, the obsession to use returns, undoing everything we’ve worked so hard to gain.

Step 10 ensures we stay on track. It reminds us to be mindful of our thoughts, feelings, and actions. When necessary, we discuss them with a trusted confidant and quickly make amends if we’ve harmed someone. As the Big Book says, “This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime.” Step 10 is like a regular check-up, ensuring we continue living by the principles that restored our sanity. By staying self-aware, we can correct course when needed and maintain the progress we’ve achieved.  We stay on the path of becoming the person who God wants us to be.

This ongoing practice is well illustrated by a scene in Rain Man (1988). In the movie, Raymond (Dustin Hoffman), an autistic savant, is obsessed with watching The People’s Court with Judge Wapner. When his brother Charlie (Tom Cruise) realizes Raymond is on the verge of a meltdown, he devises a plan to get them into a nearby farmhouse to watch the show. The catch? Raymond must act normal – no talking, no fidgeting, no drawing attention to himself. Charlie looks him over and says, “Just stand there and be quiet.” It’s 1 minute to Wapner, and Raymond is so close to getting what he wants!

But, as feared, the plan falls apart because Raymond can’t do this simple thing. Charlie, exasperated, says, “You blew it! You were in there. You had it all!” Raymond’s inability to simply be normal costs him everything he wanted.

This scene mirrors our experience with Step 10. By the time we’ve worked through Steps 4 to 9, we’re on the verge of something great—a life of stability, freedom, and peace.  We’re so close to having it all. But without Step 10 (and remaining steps), we risk losing everything. If we stop taking personal inventory and correcting our mistakes, we fall back into self-centeredness and old habits of selfishness, resentment, dishonesty, and fear. The normalcy we’ve worked so hard to achieve slips away, and we regress back into insanity. The obsession with alcohol and drugs returns.

Therefore, as we go about our daily lives, we face many inflection points, just like Raymond. We can choose to be mindful, considerate, and self-aware, or we can revert to selfishness and chaos. Step 10 isn’t complicated or burdensome. It’s a reminder we carry in our heads and hearts to avoid becoming the person we used to be. When we live with this frame of mind, the obsession with alcohol remains gone, and life becomes not only manageable but very meaningful.

Critiquing Success: The Irony of 12 Step Attacks

At CORE, we stand by Bill Wilson’s belief that our foremost responsibility is to provide newcomers with a thorough presentation of the 12 Step program. This mission lies at the very heart of our work.

CORE’s purpose is to guide individuals toward lasting freedom from the chains of substance abuse. We do more than offer a support group or temporary refuge; we lead clients on a comprehensive and transformative journey that has been tried and proven for more than eight decades. The 12 Step program, recognized as the gold standard in recovery, continues to be the most effective evidence-based method for achieving long-term sobriety. Its success is not only reflected in countless individual stories but also substantiated by consensus scientific research.

Our commitment extends beyond guiding clients through their recovery journeys.  We also feel a deep responsibility to stay informed about the latest literature on addiction and recovery, especially perspectives and critiques of the 12 Steps. These viewpoints have the potential to influence the recovery paths of our clients.

Many potential clients approach CORE burdened by more than just addiction. They often carry a complex history of previous treatment experiences—having cycled through multiple rehabs, hospitals, and sessions with physicians and counselors. Along the way, they’ve gathered various pieces of information—some helpful, some benign, and others potentially harmful—that shape their beliefs and attitudes toward recovery.

In this article, we aim to address two particularly misleading and harmful claims about the 12 Steps: that they are “not evidence-based” and that they have been shown to be ineffective in helping anyone recover. Such misinformation can be deadly if it steers people away from the most effective recovery program available.

What could motivate someone to make such claims? More often than not, it’s to promote and sell an alternative approach to recovery. Substance abuse treatment has become big business in America, with the federal government alone spending over $44 billion last year on prevention and treatment programs. Desperate people are willing to spend money, lots of money, and there is a large industry out there responding to that demand.  Steering persons in need away from the 12 Steps has become a common business practice.

Take, for example, the “harm reduction” people who assure addicts that they can smoke marijuana daily and still be exemplary parents, or even maintain a heroin addiction while being loving and responsible spouses.  For addicts who find life without drugs intolerable, such overtures appear to be an attractive, easier and softer alternative to working the 12 Step program, which leads to abstinence.  Telling potential customers that the 12 Steps are scientifically suspect, or not evidence-based, becomes part of the sales pitch.

Egregiously, such criticism also comes from credentialed persons who should know better.  One example is Harvard professor Lance Dodes.  Dodes published a book, The Sober Truth: Debunking the Bad Science Behind 12 Step Programs, specifically intending to challenge and discredit the 12 Steps.  We use his work as an example precisely because it illustrates irresponsible and misleading claims.  

At the outset, Dodes claims that the 12 Steps have been in use for decades “despite the absence of any scientific evidence of the approach’s efficacy, and we have been on the wrong path ever since.”  These are bold claims, and Dodes makes the mistake of relying on Cochrane Systematic Reviews as the lynchpin for his entire argument.

Such reliance inadvertently highlights the dangers of making unfounded claims.  The irony is striking, since he plays his reliance on Cochrane to full effect, telling the reader “Yet one group exists solely to sort through the glut of studies and help caregivers tune out poorly designed or reported research.”  That one group is Cochrane, whose mission “is quite simply to focus only on studies with proper protocols and minimal bias and to assemble the strongest data.”  Cochrane’s goal, he says, “is to vet all the science out there and tell us what can actually be verified.”

After making this dramatic introduction, Dodes then cites a Cochrane study. Yet, after his book’s publication, Cochrane released a definitive study finding the exact opposite of Dodes’ main premise. Cochrane found that programs designed to increase AA participation “lead to higher rates of continuous abstinence over months and years, when compared to other active treatment approaches such as cognitive behavioral therapy”!   

Cochrane’s findings completely undermine Dodes’ central argument, discrediting his book from the very beginning. We think his failure to anticipate the subsequent, definitive study calls into question his motives—was he genuinely interested in contributing to the recovery discussion, or was he simply trying to discredit a program that has helped millions, simply to promote his own?

As the book progresses, Dodes also failed to recognize Cochrane’s critique of its prior review, which pointed out a lack of “quantity and quality” in earlier studies. One wonders how Dodes could have missed that.  The omission is so significant that it casts doubt on Dodes’ entire endeavor.

By his own admission, Dodes is bound to the standards of rigorous scientific inquiry. However, in light of the undisputable evidence supporting the effectiveness of the 12 Steps, his criticisms are not just misleading—they’re disingenuous. Ignoring the substantial body of research that affirms the 12 Steps as a proven and effective path to recovery turns out to be a grave injustice to those seeking help.

In light of the foregoing, CORE reaffirms its commitment to providing our clients with the most effective, evidence-based therapy available. The 12 Steps, far from being outdated or unsupported by science, remain the gold standard in recovery, with the imprimatur of Cochrane Systematic Reviews affirming their superiority over other treatments. 

Although we specifically criticize Dodes’ book here, others certainly make these same specious claims about the 12 Steps, and all of them are doing a grave disservice to those evaluating treatment options. At CORE, clients who want evidence-based therapy can rest assured that the 12 Steps offer not just evidence-based support but the best and most comprehensive recovery approach available today. Our clients deserve nothing less.

Brandi Blom: From CORE Client to Re-Store Manager, a Memorable Journey

Meet Brandi Blom! When we sat down to interview Brandi, we didn’t expect to get a history lesson about the CORE Re-Store. By the time our meeting came to a close, we were very glad she agreed to share her story. Suffice it to say, when Brandi helped open our CORE Re-Store, the world was a different place. George W. Bush was still President of the United States, the Apple iPhone had yet to make its debut, and Bob Barker was still hosting The Price Is Right. That was March, 2007.

Times have certainly changed, but one thing has remained constant: Brandi’s dedication to growing the Re-Store from its humble beginnings into a major community resource. She’s been at the helm of the store for many years now, guiding its evolution from a small thrift store into a bustling operation with multiple locations and a range of essential services. Under her management, the Re-Store now boasts retail sites in Hollister and Branson, along with warehouses in Springfield and Branson. Its trucks travel far and wide, securing high-quality furniture, housewares, and home/office furnishings that fill the shelves and floors of its stores.

As the store manager, Brandi’s responsibilities are vast and varied.

As an example, the Re-Store is charged with furnishing every room of nineteen (19) residential facilities in Southwest Missouri – bedrooms, kitchens, living rooms, and baths – with everything needed to make these places livable for CORE’s residential community of more than 200 persons.  But that’s just the beginning.

The Re-Store also extends its charitable reach to members of the Tri-Lakes communities. Brandi proudly shares, “When CORE clients come in, we get them established with clothes and anything else they could possibly need.” The Re-Store also supports local mental health clinics, providing essential items to their clients in need. “A case manager may say the client needs this or that, and they’re on a fixed income. If it’s something we can help with, we normally do,” Brandi explains. She also ensures that toiletries and other necessities are kept in stock for those in between living accommodations who seek out CORE’s assistance.

Additionally, the Re-Store maintains a vital medical equipment lending program, offering items free of charge and without time limits. “The hospital and health clinics use us on a regular basis,” Brandi notes. “We have items that we lend out for no charge. That’s an important resource for the local community to have.”

The Re-Store’s impact extends even further through partnerships with local school districts, providing furniture and other essentials to families and students in need. Brandi specifically told us about a recent project where the Re-Store furnished a “simulated apartment” for the Branson School District. This innovative space was created to allow students to practice independent living skills, preparing them for life after graduation.

Every year, the Re-Store also teams up with the Hollister School District for a special holiday event: the Christmas Blessing Store.  At the store, set up at the school district, participating families shop for free and are blessed with household goods, toys, and clothing. Last year alone, one out of every five children in the school district benefitted from this event.

Beyond these community-focused initiatives, the Re-Store also offers a wide range of department store items at its locations, from furniture and household goods to clothing, accessories, and books. It’s a vibrant, bustling environment that serves as both a retail hub and a charitable resource, all under Brandi’s careful management.

Brandi’s journey with the Re-Store began on the very day it opened. A year later, she became the store manager. “A lot has changed since then,” she reflects.  

Indeed, early on the Re-Store began liquidating hotels and resorts, and that’s when things started to take off.   Although requiring continuous planning and resources, it significantly boosted the store’s growth.  “I don’t know of any other operation in the county that does what we do,” Brandi says. “Our objective is not to wholesale it to other hotels; we’re offering items for resale to the community, which goes to benefit CORE’s mission.”

In 2020, the Re-Store experienced a significant growth spurt. Brandi recalls, “Gary [Osborn] was in Colorado liquidating a resort there. That’s when Cary [McKee] found the building for our Hollister store. They brought me over here and asked, what do you think? I said, I think it’s perfect. That was July, and we moved over in October. It was just a few months before Covid hit. I’m really glad they bought it when they did, because what Gary was doing in Colorado ended up filling every inch of the warehouse.”

Brandi sums up her time at the Re-Store as follows, “There’s been a lot of growing, a lot of adjustments, for the most part, and it’s been a pretty smooth path upward.  There’s always growing pains.”  She’s quick to acknowledge the support of her team and volunteers, especially Mila Lane and Mandy McClean, who have been volunteers with the Re-Store for many years. She also credits Gary Osborn, CORE’s Operations Manager, for his oversight and guidance throughout the journey.

But our interview with Brandi covered more than just her professional achievements.  Brandi also has a personal story of recovery. Years ago, Brandi and her husband Jeremy were clients of CORE themselves.  As a young couple with two children, their lives were derailed by drug use while building their first house. “We lived in a trailer with the kids and decided we were going to build a house,” Brandi explains. “But when we started building, we started using meth[amphetamines] every day and stayed up all night to work on the house. It never got done because we were high. We’d build and then start taking it apart. It was just a mess,” she says.  

Legal troubles soon followed. Brandi got arrested and discovered that meth had become a real problem for her.  To her dismay, she also found out that she was unable to stop taking drugs – she was powerless.  Her mother came for her children, and her probation officer gave her a stark choice: rehab or jail. 

Brandi chose rehab and went to the Larry Simmering Center in Branson.  Then she called CORE. She didn’t have a penny to her name at that point, only a strong desire to get well.  She committed to working the 12 Step program and began her path to recovery. Jeremy followed, and together, they rebuilt their lives.

Today, Brandi and Jeremy have four children. Their oldest son is a welder with two children of his own, their two daughters are college students studying to become a teacher and a nurse, and their youngest is still in high school. The couple also owns Tri-Lakes Pest Control, a service company that keeps Jeremy busy, while Brandi continues to manage the Re-Store. They make their home in Kirbyville.

After all these years, Brandi has become more than just a fixture at CORE—she’s an institution in her own right. Her unwavering dedication and the caring she brings to the Re-Store everyday have made her more than a leader.  She’s become a beloved sister within our CORE family. We are incredibly proud of the life she and Jeremy have built together, and the inspiring example they set for our clients and the entire community. With everything Brandi has accomplished, we are excited to see what the future holds for her, knowing that her impact will continue to grow and inspire us all!

The 9th Step Promises: Bridging the Language Gap

The “9th Step Promises” are often read at the conclusion of AA meetings to inspire newcomers with some of the blessings that come from working the 12-Step recovery program. We also read them aloud in our recovery meetings at CORE. They are as follows:

• If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through.

• We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.

• We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.

• We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace.

• No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.

• That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.

• We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.

• Self-seeking will slip away.

• Our whole attitude and outlook on life will change.

• Fear of people and economic insecurity will leave us.

• We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.

• We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

These promises, drawn from the AA Big Book, highlight remarkable transformations that occur by working the recovery program through Step 9, which concerns making amends to others. We who have recovered understand them as great blessings because we live them every day. They are read to motivate newcomers to take action, the sole encouragement being to actively work the 12-Step program of recovery.

A newcomer does not yet experience any of these promises. They are still grappling with the challenges of being powerless over drugs and alcohol. They struggle with personal relationships, emotional instability, misery, depression, financial difficulties, and feelings of uselessness, fear, and unhappiness, among other things.

The Reader may point out that these promises seem so far removed from the life experience and motivations of the newcomer that they must appear foreign and unintelligible. Using just one example, how can anybody appreciate promises of “serenity” and “peace” when they lack any common frame of reference in the first place? This is an insightful observation, not only for the Promises but also for the 12-Step recovery program as a whole. There is a learning curve to the program.

Now, to the extent that someone wonders if these assurances seem too good to be true, the Big Book provides a ready answer: “Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us.” This observation also reflects our uniform experience at CORE. The 9th Step Promises invariably happen for everyone who works the Steps, “sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.”

That said, there is still an additional language gap to contend with. Consider experiences like holding your child for the first time, skydiving, or witnessing a pristine night sky. It’s hard to fully appreciate them without firsthand knowledge. They are truly amazing, but without any experience, they remain abstract concepts that only careful instruction and guidance can begin to illuminate.

We find something similar with the 9th Step Promises. They are filled with meaning for those of us who’ve recovered, but to a newcomer, they may seem abstract or unattainable.

This language gap presents real challenges for traditional 12-Step groups, where members attend a few hour-long meetings each week, go home, and have little contact in between, except perhaps with a sponsor. The difficulties arising from this situation go beyond merely explaining the benefits of the program to newcomers; they involve explaining the nuts and bolts of the program, too. This practical challenge has been noted by commentators on AA and NA for decades and doesn’t easily resolve itself.

Happily, at CORE, we provide a solution. Our newcomers are surrounded by people who, through action and instruction, bring the 12 Steps and all of the Big Book’s promises to life. Our program comprises a community of hundreds of members in various stages of recovery, supervised by a group of dedicated staff who collectively share hundreds of years of recovery experience. We work, live, sleep, and play as a community, 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. We believe this is one of the reasons CORE is so successful.

Any one of our staff can give a detailed account of how a specific 9th Step Promise has been fulfilled in their life, providing concrete examples when needed. We can also teach in-depth classes on one or more of the Steps for the benefit of one newcomer or an entire group. Our 12-Step recovery instructors teach weekly classes that detail the Steps and their outcomes. Senior members of our community go out of their way to sit down with newcomers and explain the entire program in detail. Beyond this, we model recovery for CORE’s entire community and share our experience, strength, and hope whenever the opportunity arises. Our year-long residential recovery program is both comprehensive and effective.

For newcomers, the 9th Step Promises provide but a glimpse into the transformation possible through the 12-Step program. These promises may seem distant and unattainable at first, but at CORE, we bridge the language gap and provide a fully supportive and engaging community where these promises come to life. For those who come to us for help, the path to recovery is not just a possibility; it’s a reality waiting to be realized. The rewards are beyond measure, offering a new freedom, happiness, and peace that truly transform lives.

Our Step Eight Motives: the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Reaching Step 8 can feel like we’re riding through a perilous and forbidding Spaghetti Western landscape.

We’ve undoubtedly come a long way, but during our addictions, we were like tornadoes tearing through people’s lives. Friends, family, and associates were left worn out, suspicious, and even resentful. They may not be feeling very neighborly toward us right now.

If our recovery means anything, we have to grow up and take responsibility for our past conduct. Repairing the wreckage of our lives includes making right our wrongs, and Step 8 prepares us to do this. It reads:

“Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.”

The Big Book is straightforward on this, stating: “We have a list of all persons we have harmed and to whom we are willing to make amends. We made it when we took inventory,” and adds, “If we haven’t the will to do this, we ask until it comes.”

Many commentators have elaborated on Step 8, turning it into a grand endeavor with recommendations for inventories, worksheets, guided imagery, affirmations, meditations, and more. However, we may fairly question the necessity of these elaborate tools if we have the right motivations when undertaking this step. Approaching our amends with the appropriate state of mind renders these additional suggestions superfluous.

When we have made the list of people we have harmed and are reflecting carefully upon each instance, we check our motive. Unless we want an amends turning into an Old West showdown, we must proceed with the right attitude. Is our motive good, bad, or ugly?

The Good

When our motive is good, we go beyond expressing regret; we want to take active steps to repair the harm and demonstrate our genuine commitment to change. We act according to God’s will and timing, for the sake of others and not for ourselves.

Our willingness flows from a commitment to doing what is right and taking responsibility for our conduct. We see this as a moral, ethical duty that aligns with our understanding of God’s will. Therefore, no personal weakness – whether fear, pride, or other obstacle – will stand in our way. We’re dedicated to seeing it through even though we’ve resolved never to repeat the mistake.

We also genuinely care about the well-being of others. We’re empathetic, sensitive to their experiences, and believe their feelings should be validated. Providing a sense of closure is important, too – making the amends will aid a healing process that lets them move forward without lingering resentments or unresolved emotions.

Another goal for us is to restore trust and build, rebuild, or prevent the deterioration of the relationship. We want to address the matter personally and directly, if possible, to mitigate misunderstandings and prevent conflicts from escalating.

Finally, we aspire to be a positive role model and set an example of honesty, accountability, and humility.

In sum, when our readiness to correct the wrong is sincere, we’re in the right place to work Step 9, making our amends.

The Bad

In contrast to the good, there may be an instance when our willingness to heal an old hurt is less than genuine, or downright bad. Neither personal integrity nor doing God’s will rank highly on our list of priorities.

Maybe we’re seeking emotional relief or trying to get something we want. Even when making the amends is a priority—i.e., we’re willing—it may not be due to good motives.

Apologies can manipulate another’s emotions or actions. They can generate sympathy or pity or be used to divert attention from our misconduct. They may be crafted in a way that subtly blames the victim, imbuing them with an emotional burden or guilt and making them wonder if they are responsible for the situation.

An amends may also be fueled by our own ego, or to earn respect, or to appear as the most humble person in the room.

There is also the attitude that we never know when we’ll need a favor, or that a strategic retreat in the form of an apology makes the other think we respect their feelings and somehow helps us stay in the game.

When our motives are bad, we use amends to purposefully manipulate our social interactions and resolve conflicts in our favor.  In such instances, we appear to be incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty.  Sooner or later, these pretenses probably will blow up in our faces.  

The Ugly

Ugly motives are conflicting, messy, and impair our willingness to make a needed amends. They usually are a sign that we haven’t fully worked our Steps in the first place.

Perhaps we feel some compulsion to do the right thing, but we’re paralyzed by fear – fear of rejection, retaliation, or some other negative consequence. Or, lack of confidence in ourselves makes one or more amends seem too daunting to pursue.

Shame or guilt may cloud our ability to think and move forward.

Pride and stubbornness keep us at a standstill. We worry that admitting a wrong and apologizing will belittle our self-image and make us look weak.

Rationalizing or justifying our behavior is a path to denial and resentments.

If we lack faith that anything good will come from doing God’s will and making the amends, we’ll invariably sit on our hands.

Our ugly motives are relatively easy to spot. They are among the most obvious “character defects” identified in the preceding Steps, which we very much need to go back and address.

Conclusion

Our motives matter. If they are bad or ugly, we’ll remain stuck in the same isolated relationship landscape that characterized our life in addiction.

When our intentions are pure, we can move forward to making amends with the genuine aim of healing relationships and restoring trust, motivated by compassion and a commitment to doing what’s right. Selflessness not only benefits those we’ve harmed but also aids in our own spiritual growth and recovery.  We’ll address the benefits more fully next month, in the context of Step 9.

Katie Rhodes: Rising Dawn in Recovery

A Journey from Darkness to Light

Meet Katie Rhodes! Recently, we had the pleasure of chatting with Katie, who generously shared her journey in recovery and the newfound clarity, understanding, and awareness that has come with it.

Her story is one of profound transformation. Having battled addiction and come out on the winning side, she now stands as a wonderful role model for clients in our recovery program.

Today, Katie enjoys many roles with CORE. She is the house manager of our women’s intake house and our facilities manager in Branson. She also teaches 4D Recovery classes and leads our weekly orientation for new clients. Her busy days are filled with purpose and service, which she embraces with dedication and enthusiasm.

Katie came from a broken home where substance abuse loomed large. As a child, she was a straight-A student and a self-described “classic overachiever” who won spelling bees and writing contests. However, during her junior year of high school, her town was hit by a storm and tornado, leaving her house without power for several months. Katie began visiting friends on the side of town that still had power, where she was introduced to drinking and drugs.

Before long, Katie was using drugs regularly and dropped out of school to party. Being shuffled between parents didn’t help. She moved out on her own when she turned 18 years old. Katie quit using substances when she became pregnant with her partner, but after she gave birth, her life took a downturn when her partner brought heroin home. “That’s the moment I can go back to and say that my life changed,” she says.

The next decade of her life was pure chaos, characterized by drug use, an unstable home life, and tenuous connections with family. Katie recounted for us her life as “the dope man’s girlfriend.” She had another baby, and custody of both children was placed with grandparents.

Katie then made several unsuccessful trips to rehab. She says, “There are a lot of well-meaning people in that field. Unless they understand addiction, they can’t be any help at all. No matter how long you stay in rehab, you’ll go out and make the same mistakes because you’re powerless over your addiction.”

She came to CORE for the first time in 2018 but stayed only three months. Looking back, Katie laments, “I didn’t do anything toward my recovery. I thought I’d be solid with some time to get under my feet. I never worked the Steps. I went to Illinois to be with a guy, which was a terrible idea. I left here on a Wednesday and was drunk by Saturday.” Katie continued to flounder and finally landed in a sober living house on the outskirts of St. Louis. It was there that she had a life-changing epiphany:

“It was just one house and only four people in the whole house. On my second day there, we went to an outside meeting where they talked about the 12 Steps. I remembered my time at CORE when I’d refused to do them. I suddenly thought, how can I sit here, asking why I can’t get sober, when I never even tried doing the Steps? I’d never even tried to get sober. And it occurred to me that I could. That was an eye-opening day, a good day.”

Thus, Katie returned to CORE in September 2022. She sees this as significant because it is the first time she ever began working the 12 Steps. She remembers, “I gave it my all. And it works. That’s all it took, just actually doing them. I drank the Kool-Aid and gave in to doing them. It tastes good (laughing).”

Katie describes her subsequent recovery as a time when the pieces of her life are falling together in new and unexpected ways, more wonderful than she could have ever imagined. A significant part of this transformation is her deepened relationship with God. Katie shared about her profound spiritual awakening as follows:

“I always believed in God but was mad at Him. Now, God is my best friend. Legit. I say my prayers when I wake up in the morning and at nighttime. Even during the day, I talk to God as my best friend and stay in constant contact. How ungrateful would I be not to uphold a positive relationship with Him when He’s blessed me?”

Early in recovery, Katie explored various churches around Branson but feels a special connection with our own CORE Church. “I get my church here at CORE,” she matter-of-factly says. She’s open to the messages shared by our pastor Cary McKee because of his empathy and understanding. “He’s been where I’ve been,” Katie notes, highlighting the unique bond and sense of community she feels at CORE Church, which she describes as “a totally judgment-free zone.”

Katie has felt gratitude in her heart every day for her new life. When she graduated from our one-year program, she remembered the Lord’s words, “from everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded.” She not only joined our Second Mile group but also signed up to go through our presenter’s training so that she could teach recovery classes. Katie was nervous before the first class she taught but now feels comfortable in this new role. Significantly, she says, “It means little to know everything in the Big Book if you don’t apply it in your own life. You have to show everybody that you’re living it, too. Every day of your life.”

She also became house manager for our women’s intake house in Branson. Katie admits to becoming attached to the women in her house, as well as becoming emotional when they move up to a CORE peer house. She shrugs, “But that’s the process. I only get them for a short time.  We try to accomplish as much as possible. The fact that they move to a peer house means they’re growing.” She identifies the house’s morning devotionals as important time for her house. Every day, at 7:15 a.m., the entire house gathers in the living room to read from the Bible or other devotional materials. Katie observes with satisfaction when participants say, “it’s talking to me,” during readings.

For the newcomer to CORE, Katie has valuable advice: “Open your Big Book. Read it. Do what it tells you to do. Also, especially on intake where you come to the Center every day, look around and listen. Find someone that you want what they have in recovery and gravitate toward them. Stick with the winners. Don’t spend your time gossiping or worrying about a relationship with a guy.”

On the personal front, Katie has entered her sons’ lives again. She becomes emotional talking about them and expresses heartfelt thankfulness for having both with her this past Christmas. Her oldest son calls her every day now. In August, Katie will go on vacation with her youngest and his grandmother. She says having her children back in her life is beyond wonderful, “something I thought would never happen, you know?”

Looking to the future, Katie’s dedication to her role within CORE appears unwavering. “I need to be here unless I have a really good reason to leave,” she says, “everything’s here, in terms of being able to help people and do something good with my life.” When asked where she sees herself in three years, Katie said, “Honestly, I see myself here,” she says, “I feel called to do this!”

We at CORE appreciate Katie’s commitment to her own recovery and her dedication to guiding newcomers. She exemplifies the strength and hope that comes from turning our will and life over to the care of God. We expect her recovery journey to continue to shine as a beacon of new beginnings and endless possibilities for everyone she meets!

CORE’s Annual Golf Tournament Scores Big!

On May 16th, Tri-Lakes golfers gathered to elevate CORE’s annual golf tournament to new heights. Held at the stunning Thousand Hills Golf Resort in Branson, the event was a resounding success, boasting impressive fundraising and enthusiastic participation.

Thousand Hills Golf Resort, consistently voted “Best in Branson,” provided a breathtaking backdrop for the day. As the early morning rain showers cleared, the course glowed with a vibrant green that would make the historic links of St. Andrews envious. The verdant beauty was enhanced by deer, woodchucks, and various critters emerging from the forest, along with waterfowl swimming in the lakes. Participants and spectators alike marveled at the pristine conditions and scenic beauty of the course.

The tournament has grown significantly since 2022. From 76 golfers, this year’s event saw 112 competitors, underscoring its rising popularity and importance on the community calendar. Teams from various local businesses and groups participated, including the Branson Police Department. Friends of CORE also fielded teams, all displaying camaraderie and sportsmanship, contributing to a fun and friendly competition!

This year marked the first all-day event, as the large field of golfers made an afternoon-only schedule impractical. The extended day also allowed participants to attend CORE’s Dinner and Live/Silent Auctions later that evening.

Participants received complimentary swag bags filled with CORE-logoed golf towels, balls, tees, ball markers, and divot tools, along with sunglasses and tasty snacks for the match.  The top six teams in two flights received cash prizes ranging from $400 up to $1,200.  Prizes were awarded for hole competitions, too.

A highlight of the event was the grand prize for the hole-in-one contest: a stunning $70,000 Chevy pickup by Pinegar Chevrolet Buick GMC. Though no one claimed the prize, the challenge added excitement and anticipation to the day. Kyler Patterson, head of the Pro Shop at Thousand Hills, reported that one golfer came tantalizingly close, just two feet from a hole-in-one!

Another high point was the impressive Jeep brought by Pink Jeep Tours, not for off-roading on the course but to showcase a really exciting, alternative way to experience the Ozarks’ magic.

Gather & Graze, another event sponsor, provided a delicious lunch spread that received rave reviews. The gourmet offerings from this famous charcuterie bar ensured everyone was well-fed and had happy tummies.

All proceeds from this year’s tournament support CORE’s mission to provide effective alternatives to substance abuse and aid those affected by it. This event not only offered a day of entertainment and competition but also made a meaningful contribution to combating this critical issue within our community.  CORE is very grateful for all of the participants and sponsors, and we hope this cherished tradition continues for years to come!

A Night of Generosity:
CORE’s Record-Breaking Fundraiser!

On May 16th, our community gathered at CORE for an unforgettable evening filled with food, fun, and philanthropy. This year’s annual dinner and auctions surpassed all expectations, breaking records and garnering unprecedented support for CORE’s mission. The evening featured a delectable dinner, a 50/50 raffle, and both live and silent auctions that kept the auditorium buzzing with excitement. It was the most successful charity event in our organization’s history, providing important support for our cause.

Publicity and Preparations

We attribute this record-breaking attendance to our presenter, Ozarks Dynacom, whose popular family of radio stations masterfully promoted the event. Our publisher, Image Works, Inc., also played a significant role by creating beautiful ads distributed on our website, electronically, and in print.

A Feast to Remember

CORE’s culinary team set the tone for the evening with a sumptuous dinner. Guests enjoyed a mouth-watering spread featuring roast pork and chicken, accompanied by classic sides like potato salad, coleslaw, and pit beans. The culinary delights continued with a variety of scrumptious desserts, ensuring no one left unsatisfied.

The dinner was not only a feast for the palate but also a time for attendees to connect, have fun, and share their commitment to CORE’s mission.

Silent Auction Treasures

While dinner was underway, a silent auction featuring about 30 exceptional items drew significant interest and competitive bidding. The diverse selection included cozy home goods, gift certificates to local eateries, tickets to live shows and theaters, handcrafted items from local artisans, and luxurious “staycation” packages at nearby resorts. There were also certificates for local services, ensuring something for everyone. The silent auction really highlighted the generosity of our local businesses and artisans.

The Thrill of the 50/50 Raffle

The excitement ramped up with the drawing for our 50/50 raffle, which generated thousands of dollars in ticket sales at $5 per ticket. The room was electric as the winner was announced, adding a thrilling element to the night while supporting a great cause.

Live Auction Extravaganza

The highlight of the evening was the live auction, which began on a sweet note with the auctioning of pies and cakes. These homemade delights sparked intense bidding wars, setting the mood for the rest of the evening. Cakes and pies fetched hundreds of dollars apiece as generous bidders competed to support our charity. The excitement continued as the auction transitioned to larger, highly coveted items.

As an example, one standout item was a limited edition football donated by the Kansas City Chiefs, drawing a winning bid of over a thousand dollars. Additionally, a blade made by “Forged in Fire” champion Davy Wilson and a hand-built AR-15 also brought in several thousands more.  Entertainment and staycation packages, a kayak, and a unique fishbowl filled with money were among the other highlights. Remarkably, the winner of the fishbowl donated the money back to CORE, embodying the evening’s spirit of generosity.  In all, over 50 items went up for bid at the auction.

A Record-Breaking Success

During the evening, our CEO Cary McKee took the stage to thank all attendees, sponsors, and those who donated auction items. He was overwhelmed (for good reason!) by the sincere generosity of everyone who contributed. By night’s end, the combined proceeds from the dinner, raffle, and auctions marked this event as CORE’s most successful fundraiser to date. The overwhelming turnout and enthusiastic participation surpassed all expectations, reflecting the community’s deep commitment to CORE’s mission.

A Heartfelt Thank You!

From all of us at CORE, we extend our heartfelt gratitude to everyone who attended, donated, and supported our event. The outpouring of generosity is a testament to the bonds within our community and our shared dedication to helping individuals escape a life of substance abuse. CORE’s mission is to provide the most effective recovery program available, and the funds raised at this event will greatly further our efforts in 2024!